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Supporting a New Mummy – Postpartum Advice
Jun
Hi there,
I have been reading through so many of these posts lately and they have helped me so much with my journey to and throughout motherhood.
There really isn’t anything you can do to prepare yourself fully for the roller coaster that comes within those first postpartum weeks. You think you’re ready, you have your hospital bag ready, your baby items all ready to go at home, but when you’re so busy getting all of the items you think you need do you ever stop to think about your mental health and how you are prepared for this mentally?
As my baby shower approached I had people asking me what gifts I would like, and yes I had everything already and I just knew that I would need support more than anything else. Feeling loved and supported is the best gift one could receive from a friend during such an exhausting and vulnerable time. All I said was, please just be there for me when the baby arrives that will be a gift in itself.
And so here’s what they did….
Home cooked meals
Especially if nursing, mummy’s really do crave a good nutritious meal. Believe it or not, a simple home cooked meal is one of the most thoughtful gifts one can receive. My friends came over to drop me off a meal every now and then which I could freeze in batches.
Baby love
During the newborn rush I remember how lovely it was that my friends and family came over to visit and just give my baby some love. This gave me some time to shower, freshen up and get myself recharged.
Tidying up
My best friend came over not just for baby cuddles but to tidy up, wash my dishes and fold the laundry. Mess really stressed me out and most of the time I was just too tired to clean up after myself so this really went a long way for me.
Food shop
Receiving a text message from my friends to say, “im nipping to the market do you need anything?” was like music to my ears. Most of the time I always needed something and with the hubby working all the hours under the sun he isn’t always around to help with the shopping.
Girl talk
Some days I just needed to cry, rant and laugh with. Some lighthearted chit chat free of judgement really went a long way and helped the experience feel not so lonely.
If you are a postpartum mummy reading this or will be soon, my greatest piece of advice to you is to accept and ask for help when you need it! If you friends are anything like mine then they will seek joy in giving just as much as you do receiving it! 🙂
A massive thing that helped me was asking for help when i needed it, alot of people think people will automatically help out but some people just generally dont realize. So if you need an hour sleep because your soooo tired ask your partner , parents or a friend if they could pop round for an hour or two just so you can get some sleep. Aslo a little walk every day to get out of the messy house and the same 4 walls really helped me and is definitely something I think everyone should try if your a stressed pop to the shops or a closes friends house for a coffee just that little walk will do the world of good.
I am currently 3 weeks post par tum and I cannot express how teary I am at everything, I am getting really angry at my partner for the slightest things and thinking everything is his fault, I cannot look in a mirror without falling to my knees with disgust. I feel like this whole mum thing is not for me I am really not coping well I feel like I dont know what I am doing. Is this normal ? Would be so grateful for advice
hey there, its completely normal hun even months down the line, give yourself a break you have not long had your baby, youre doing amazing!!! trust me, everyone talks about this baby bubble well it didnt happen for me, the first couple of months was hell. adjusting to being sleep deprived and trying to learn my baby and what she wants with each cry was frustrating and exhausting. hang on in there, as babe grows up and you start getting something back you will see that it was all worth it xx