I dont really even know where to start with my story but here we go. I am married to my first love we have been together since the age of 17. I am now 29 and have always wanted a big family, on our 3rd date I told him I wanted to be a stay at home wife and have lots of children and he just nodded and agreed. His mother told him not to worry as I didnt even have 1 child yet she was convinced I would change my mind. But now we have a 5 year old a 3 year old and a 1 year old. I told my husband I would like one more baby he didnt really want a fourth but he agreed just to make me happy. Last month we found out I was pregnant and at our 8 week ultrasound found out it was twins! This has been the hardest time in our marriage at the moment with everything going through our heads. I feel so guilty feeling all this negativity to having twins because I tried for this pregnancy and I got blessed with not one but two babies but right now I just dont know how I am going to cope with 5 children 5 and under. Sorry for this massive story about my life but i needed to get it off my chest. Please dont judge I just wanted a big family.